FRIENDS AND GARDENS

Dahlia

Dahlia

What would life be like without friendships? Friends may be best pals, walking buddies, our biggest supporters and sometimes, trusted confessors. I can’t imagine what I would do without them.

Recently it occurred to me that I don’t have as many friends as I used to. In my twenties, I considered dozens of people to be friends. That changed with parenthood and adult responsibilities but I still had what I considered to be lots of friends.  That’s no longer the case.  I’ve been asking my friends if this is true of their lives and they all agree: we have fewer friends now but more satisfying friendships. We want to spend time with people who enrich our lives. Sometimes this means letting unsatisfying relationships dwindle and making time to nurture the friendships we truly value.

I have spent the last week working in the flower garden. After seven years of sweating and itching, dressed like an astronaut to avoid tick and mosquito bites, I have finally got my little patch into shape. Gone are the plants that caught my eye but then never really took hold; uprooted as well are those that ran rampant, monopolizing the whole space. It’s taken years to work out which plants are pleasing and reliable and which ones are okay to let go.

It reminds me of a quotation my good friend, Morella Camjeo, sent me years ago:

Nobody sees a flower – really – it is so small
it takes time – we haven’t time – and to see
takes time, like to have a friend takes time.
Georgia O’Keefe

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About Alexis

Alexis Rankin Popik, author of Kiss Me Over the Garden Gate, is an award-winning short story writer whose work has appeared in The Berkshire Review and Potpourri Magazine. She has penned numerous articles about local history that have been published in Connecticut Explored and the University of Connecticut School of Law and The Hartford Seminary publications. A former union organizer, Popik traveled the country educating shipyard workers about health and safety and founded a labor-management health plan before turning to writing fiction full-time. She lives with her husband in New England.
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